Fury Over Man’s Gift for Wife’s 50th—After What He Got for His Own Birthday


A woman’s disappointment over her 50th birthday gift—a vacuum cleaner—has sparked conversation online after she said she had taken her husband to Hawaii for his own half-century celebrations.

In a post on Reddit, the woman said that her husband, 53, woke her up on her birthday to tell her there was a surprise waiting downstairs. But when she went to see what it was, she found an unwrapped Eureka PowerSpeed canister vacuum.

Newsweek spoke to licensed mental health counselor and founder of Attuned Therapy, Alyson Curtis, about the post, which has gone viral with more than 26,000 upvotes.

“He said he thought I’d like a new one since the current one doesn’t have the ability to turn off the brush roller when using on hard floors. I never asked for a new one. It works fine,” the original poster wrote.

A man holds a shopping bag
Stock photo: A man holds up a red shopping bag in the street.

Miljan Živković/Getty Images

But the letdown didn’t end there. A month prior, the husband had mentioned the idea of a special trip, but instead of planning anything, he waited for her to decide.

“When he turned 50 I took him to Hawaii,” she wrote. “Maybe I’m just being hypersensitive.”

The post quickly saw commenters criticizing the husband’s lack of thoughtfulness.

“I told my kids when they were young and my partner, never to buy me anything for my birthday or mother’s day that has anything to do with cooking or cleaning,” one person wrote.

Another suggested a more-dramatic reaction: “Take yourself to Hawaii, and leave the vacuum in the living room.”

An Expert Weighs In

Curtis told Newsweek that this kind of birthday disappointment is actually quite common in relationships.

“You have a particular idea for how you’d like to be treated for a birthday, anniversary or other holiday,” Curtis said. “You signal little clues or ideas hoping your partner will get the hint. The big day comes, and what you receive not only underwhelms you, but it hurts. Not only does it feel like negligence, but that they don’t even understand you.”

Curtis added that many people expect their partners to instinctively “get” them, but in reality, communication is key.

“As much as we may loathe it, direct communication can ameliorate these types of upset,” Curtis said. “So many of us have this belief that what we want and how we like to be loved shouldn’t have to be spelled out. And it definitely shouldn’t have to be spelled out multiple times or over the course of a relationship.”

Curtis encouraged the woman to ask herself whether she genuinely believes her husband meant to hurt her or if this was simply a case of miscommunication.

“If the answer is dubious, deeper soul-searching may be required to sort out if this relationship is really serving you,” Curtis said.

While the Reddit post may have sparked fury, the real question is whether this couple can bridge their communication gap—or if the vacuum cleaner is just a symptom of a much bigger issue.

Newsweek reached out to u/Plastic_Cat9560 for comment via Reddit.



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