A 71-year-old who has been married for nearly 45 years has captivated younger audiences by telling how her love story was anything but accidental.

In a viral TikTok video, Anne Abel recounted her long journey to meeting husband Andy and sharing life with her him.

The video delighted viewers online, especially younger ones, who appreciated Abel’s storytelling, and it has now gained more than two million views and nearly 240,000 likes.

“There was nothing lucky or serendipitous about it,” Abel said in the video about finding her husband. “I worked really, really hard to find him.”

Abel spoke to Newsweek about her efforts in love and what she learned along the way.

Her determination to find the right partner began when she was just 11 years old, she told Newsweek.

Abel grew up in a tumultuous household where family expectations loomed large. Her parents—a high school guidance counselor and a research scientist—placed pressure on her to excel academically and marry the “right” person. For her mother, that meant someone Jewish, intellectual and successful.

Her father’s expectations were no less rigid. When Abel was a high school senior, he told her she had to major in chemical engineering—or else her parents wouldn’t pay for college. Despite struggling with math and science, Abel complied, earning her degree at Tufts University through sheer determination.

However, while Abel followed her parents’ instructions in many areas, she drew the line at love.

“I would do and did do whatever my parents told me to do, even going to and completing engineering school,” Abel said. “But somehow, instinctively…I knew that the man I married had to be someone I married for me.”

Finding Andy

Abel’s standards for a partner were clear: intelligence was non-negotiable.

“Smart was sexy,” she said. “Some people look for money, I looked for brains.
Andy is very very smart.”

In Abel’s TikTok video, she recounted plans to settle down with several flames—taking her from Tufts to Portugal—but none of them stuck. With Andy, though, the connection was immediate.

“I found a smart professor who is kind, patient, supportive, confident but humble,” she said.

This ease stood in stark contrast to the struggles of Abel’s earlier life. She spent years trying to earn her parents’ approval. But in Andy, she found someone who accepted her unconditionally.

Viewers in the comments on Abel’s TikTok recognized this one-of-a-lifetime kind of love—and Abel’s skill in speaking about it.

“With all due respect, [..] your life story is so captivating, it should be made into a book or movie,” one user wrote.

“Girl, I was at the edge of my seat,” another added. “Fantastic storytelling.”

Building a life together

Abel and Andy’s marriage has been defined by respect, teamwork and mutual admiration.

“I so, so, so respect his opinions.” Abel said, remembering how he once advocated for her health during a hospital stay, catching a critical medical oversight that others had missed.

Their life together has also been a balance of differences. Abel describes herself as an extrovert who thrives on storytelling and adventure, while Andy is more reserved and content with a quieter life.

Despite their contrasting personalities, they’ve supported each other through every challenge, from raising three children to navigating severe depression.

Through counseling and open communication, the couple worked through their differences, emerging stronger than ever.

A lifetime of love

Looking back on nearly five decades of marriage, Abel emphasized the importance of making decisions for oneself, rather than succumbing to external pressures.

“Do it for you, not for them,” she advised. “You’re the one who will be inside the house with that person.”

And Abel really, really loves sharing her house with Andy.

“We are a really good team,” she said. “I love just being in Andy’s presence…It is more fun doing anything with Andy than alone. I just like having him there beside me.”